bReAkInG aWaY...

I should have known omans are a hint of some events in near future. “Nor heaven nor earth have been at peace tonight’ these lines from Julius Cesar truly describes my nightmares since few days! Things happen the way they are destined to be and I guess it cannot be changed.Something unexpected happened today. 

Until this morning I never knew the pain of losing something so dear, someone so close, somebody with whom u have been since so long.It seems your world has turned upside down. The pace of life has slowed down, so slow as if stationary! It’s the basic human tendency to live the happy time for long and skip the lows of life instantly. I always wished if I could freeze the time in moments of merriment and fast forward its scale when empty.   

Today was not a great day as it is always, not because I’m unwell but there’s something else. I guess I’m going to remember this date for long because its 6/7/2012 when I broke up. 

I was never this way before. People use to say happy go lucky person, spreading smiles since birth. Though might get violent at times and some mood swings here and there. I was always titled as one who always kept an apt balance between every relation, capable of setting up the priorities right and caring enough so as to preserve even the oldest thing bursting up with memories.

It’s really hard to believe that all of this has ended. I know you might find it very silly of me to share such a thing here in this space, but let me make it very clear I write here for myself and take an opportunity to share some memorable excerpts and events of my life with you all. And this thing is here because it was really very close to me. We were together since I was 16 year old. 

I still remember the day 19^th April when my dad introduced him to me. It was a family outing to Nakhrali Dhani – a theme park on the outskirts of the city. Family and friends every one was there, vividly remember his black attire and that eye catchy yellow cap J. Since then if not BFF we were like great friends.

He had been there for me every time I needed, like a true friend, no conditions no demands! It proved to be a lucky charm, lending a helping hand in almost every project of mine. I still remember how efficiently and effortlessly he use to write n number of pages for me (since typed printouts were not that popular that time). And demanded nothing else than his usual blue drink. Till date his stamina remained the same.

I accept the fact that I have not been in touch with him since some time. Rather since I entered my college life, other things occupied me more frequently. But he never complained of it, be it for short intervals, he was always the same every time we were together.

This morning, we were together walking down the stairs of my apartment. I was busy with my phone and the other hand grasped his hold. The cleaner had just mobbed the floor few minutes before. Suddenly I slipped off, though I was able to control myself but lost his grasp. He fell down, rolling down over about 10 stairs! And the poor thing, bled… all in BLUE!!!

I was almost in a state of shock for few seconds. And he was still quiet though it was my carelessness that resulted fracturing his body. My eyes were all in tears. The pain was from within the gut! I rushed down to check him up and took him to my home, pulled out that age old bottle of blue drink, dipped his head into that bottle and pumped it. As it got filled I checked him again.

Alas! It was nothing big. He just got his Nib fractured. Though the body was also damaged, but I know I can replace that part with the spare one I still have. As far as nib is concerned I guess I can still get a parker pen nib at some stationary shop! By the way I am still in pain, regretting how careless I can be at times. As mentioned before, I’ve managed to preserve smallest thing associated with some special memories. But feeling so down, I broke up my favorite pen of school time this very day! My dad has gifted to me on my 16^th birthday, unlike other it was a designer one with a metallic body and platinum nib.

I was wondering, breaking up such a dear thing disturbed me so much, what would be the condition of people who end up breaking their year old relationships. What??? Isn’t it??? Hope the title did not mislead the readers, it was just a pen in my case!!!

Thank God I never got into the complicated thing. I’ve escaped being messed up with such stuff with living beings. May be because I always treat/keep people at an equal radius to me, but yea there are many circles around where in I am centered. So here I am… proudly single since birth! And is actually loving it ;-)